Honouring Our Emotions for Deep Self Care - Michelle Diasinos

Honouring Our Emotions for Deep Self Care - Michelle Diasinos
Often when we begin the path of a mindful motherhood, we become so caught up in meeting our child’s needs that we forget to take care of our own....

Many of us are not accustomed to caring of ourselves because we were not taught how to do this as we were growing in adulthood and motherhood. Sometimes it may even be because we are not yet aware of what our needs are exactly and how to figure out what our needs are.  

When I reflect back on my own personal experiences, I realised that I had not experienced deep self care until I became a mother. The challenges I was met with in motherhood revealed my vulnerabilities and I was called to care for myself so that I could better hold space for my children’s intense emotions.

So how can we build a bridge between where we are to where we want to be?

We can begin by attuning to our own emotions.

Our emotions are a gateway. They are leaving us clues and communicating to us an underlying need, and our underlying needs can be revealed to us through our triggers.

If we can understand what is triggering us and why we are getting triggered, then we can begin cultivating mindful and intentional responses that are in alignment with how we really want to show up in life and in motherhood. Here are some tools you can begin using today.

In the conflicting moment or when we are feeling uncomfortable emotions we can:

    Notice our breath. No need to change it, just simply notice it. Does it feel short, sharp, laboured?
    Ground yourself. Feel the floor under your feet.
    Ask ourselves: What am I feeling right now? Identify the emotion that is passing through your body. Make space for it. Be there with it.
    Take a few deep belly breaths with an exhale that is longer than your inhale, to activate the parasympathetic nervous system
    Place your hand on your heart or belly and repeat a silent mantra (e.g. "I am safe", "It is safe to feel" or "Breathe".

We can also engage in self-inquiry to help us understand our triggers and to process our emotions. We can ask ourselves these reflection questions in moments of calm, much later on, as we may be feeling too dysregulated in the moment. You can journal on these or ask yourself in meditation:

    What was I feeling in that conflicting moment?
    Where in my body was I feeling it?
    What is my feeling telling me?
    What am I believing about myself?
    What am I believing about the other person?
    What do I want?
    What do I need?
    How can I get this need met? Do I need to meet it myself, or can some else meet it?
    Do I remember a time or experience in the past  when I have felt this feeling before?

These tools and reflection questions are simple but powerful and I invite you to create space to examine them.

Please keep in mind that stirring old memories through deep self-reflection can sometimes bring forth uncomfortable feelings, so remember to be kind to yourself. And if it feels overwhelming, reach out and connect to your network for support.

We’d love to know if this resonates with you and what emerges from your self-reflection. Please share with us and tag us in Larissa’s Facebook 
Community Motivated Mums, Taking Risks and Finding their voice or on Instagram @michelle.diasinos.

Michelle Lee Diasinos is a Conscious Parent Coach, International Best Selling Author, co-host of The Mothers’ Roundtable podcast and a mother of two. After a decade of working with families and educators as a teacher and occupational therapist, she recognised the immense impact of the conditioned self on our ability to connect with our children when she became a mother. Her journey inwards sparked a deep calling to support fellow mothers as they navigate their unique healing journey and break generational cycles so they can raise conscious, emotionally well future adults.

Michelle lives in Sydney, Australia with her husband Phill and their son and daughter. Woven into her days, she enjoys reading, nature walks and yoga.

Website: michellediasinos.com
Instagram: @michelle.diasinos

Facebook: @mdiasinos